“If you don’t have peace, it isn’t because someone took it from you; you gave it away. You cannot always control what happens to you, but you can control what happens in you.” – John C. Maxwell The beach is one of the few places I’m able to put life in perspective and truly experience peace. The thought that we and our problems are so small in comparison to the ocean relaxes me every time. I realize the stress I have been carrying is not worth the time I am giving it, and for a short while I am able to feel free.

We are regularly told not to worry. From the bible, doctors, from family, and friends, so why is it such a difficult task to remove stress?

Stress and worry come from the fear of the unknown or from a dreaded task. No one stresses over things they enjoy, because those things bring pleasure. The fear of pain, difficulty, or even loss is enough to derail us, sometimes for significant periods of time. So how do we stop our fears? How do we calm ourselves when it seems that the feeling of peace will never come?

Sadly I am an expert on stress and anxiety. I was born a “high stress baby” per my mother and have had little reprieve since. My mind can take even the simplest of things and turn them into horror stories. I understand the feeling of anxiety more than anyone ever should. Because of this I also understand how to work toward feeling “normal” or at least a little more relaxed.

The best medicine is always the ocean or a really good vacation, but just like most of the world, I cannot make it to the beach every day. So the days I can’t I ask myself a few questions. I start with “What am I actually afraid of?” You can break down almost any stress to the root of a perceived worse case scenario. Typically when you are able to identify that fear you are able to realize how unlikely that scenario is, or are at least able to clearly identify your feelings around it. At this point I decide how much control I have in the outcome.

Once I determine how much control I have I ask myself “Does it really matter?” In the grand scheme of things how much does this really matter? Is my reaction justified? Jimmy has taught me over and over again what is really important in our lives. He is usually able to differentiate what is worth the stress and what isn’t, especially when looking at it from the outside. Sometimes what you really need is an outside perspective to make you realize what is valuable in life and what isn’t.

What were you able to let go of today?

Until next time,

Kaycee