Today at three and a half miles I decided new running shoes were not a want but a need. My current running shoes were a random purchase during a short visit to Louisville, Kentucky, and it wasn’t until I returned to Florida that I realized it was a bad decision. They were cute, but not perfect for my feet. A year and a half later I still have them. When I am serious about buying gym shoes I usually go to specialty running stores to be fitted. Instead the pretty hot pink and neon yellow lured me into buying without properly running in them. Between the guilt over my impulse purchase and regular Tracy Anderson workouts (without the shoes) I haven’t considered getting a new pair. Multiple blisters in my arches changed that feeling this afternoon. I am planning on using an older pair tomorrow then purchasing new ones on Monday.
Today’s theme seemed to be letting go, and not just of old shoes. This morning on my way to work I listened to Joel Osteen’s Sunday message. I usually attend church over the weekend so I save his sermons for mornings when I need extra motivation. This sermon was titled “Stay on the Potter’s Wheel.” A piece of the message was about letting go, and although it applies to my poor shoe purchase, it also prepared me for the day ahead.
As I’ve said in previous posts, I Love Disney (it is the driving factor for my running 13.1 miles in case you missed that). One of my favorite Disney songs is “Let It Go” from the movie Frozen. It’s therapeutic every time I listen to it. I won’t go into a long dissertation of my life story right now, but I will say I’ve battled with anxiety for most of my life. A big part of that battle is letting go of situations I can’t change. Many of the times I have been serious about running it was never about the run, it was about the war in my head. Running helped me see straight.
Unknowingly I had a few battles waiting for me a work today. I am a registered dietitian and I was doing clinical work at a long-term care facility. I usually go to this building on Thursdays, but this week I had a change in my schedule. Around 9:30am I remembered why I avoided this building on Wednesdays. Between care plan meetings and other clinicians in the building, acquiring the charts I needed and keeping them was difficult. This was enough to push me to the edge, especially since my phone was ringing every 2 minutes for 3 hours straight (I wish I was exaggerating), but to top it off a physician’s assistant found a few charts she needed in my pile. I try to be nice when others need charts and simply request they bring them back to me once they’ve finished. When I made this simple request she rudely told me no and walked out of the room. There aren’t many things that make me want to get on a soapbox, but people that think they are better than other people is one of them. Your title is not who you are, and people should be treated equally no matter their career. None of us are holier than thou, and I think many people need to be reminded of that. (Ok I’m off my soapbox now).
After she left the room I was immediately upset. Not only with the way she treated me, but also with how little I reacted. I was hurt that someone would treat me with so little respect, and mad that there wasn’t anything I could do about it. I was about to head in a very negative direction emotionally when I remembered what Joel had said this morning. God is constantly molding us, and if we don’t listen the first time He will keep working. So I changed my reaction. What amazes me the most is I actually let it go and never became angry. In the past letting go was never this easy. The situation I encountered today would have bothered me through the evening and likely on future visits. I know I must have had assistance to let it go. Maybe it’s a reward for finally getting the message. Either way I’m trying to listen more attentively to make my lessons less painful. In the meantime I will keep running and reminding myself to “Let It Go.”
Until next time!
Kaycee
P.S. My favorite song today was Rise by Shawn McDonald. I hope you enjoy it too!